Couch to 5K to .... just stay on the couch
I'm seeing a pattern in my life, and I'm not afraid to admit it. I'm kind of a quitter. It started way back in 3rd grade when I quit Brownies, followed in 6th grade when I quit piano lessons. Then, after junior high, I gave up volleyball and track, and after freshman year, I quit basketball. Finally, after junior year, I quit band. I quit three different colleges before I finally got my bachelor's degree.
I don't know what I was thinking when, earlier this year, some co-workers convinced me to run a 5K with them. They assured me that all I had to do was follow the Couch to 5K program and it would be a breeze. In just 8 short weeks I would be running a 5K like a pro. I bought into the hype...and assumed it would be totally easy since, at the time, I had almost 20 weeks until the 5K.
Hold up, dawg...if it sounds too good to be true, it probably is! First off, how many DD track stars do you see? None...I rest my case. In fact, I just googled "female Olympic runners with big boobs" and the first hit was "Why do women athletes tend to be flat-chested?" Followed by a story in the Orange County Register that begins, "For some women, the path to athletic excellence seems to be blocked by overly large breasts, ..." There you have it, I am doomed.
Then, there's that whole BMI business. Yes, I'm obese according to the charts. About a week ago, Sherri Shepherd tweeted, "Just figured out my BMI (body mass index) ... and it turns out I'M OBESE! WHAT!!!!" I feel your pain, Sherri. Something about that chart just ain't quite right.
Then I googled "fat people running 5K," and you'd be surprised at how many entries there are about that.
I tried to be a runner once in college. I took off with my roomie Cathy out of Burge Hall. I made it down the hill on Dubuque Street, before I had to stop...after that it is kind of a blur...I think I managed to cross the Park Road bridge and head back up the bike trail, crossing the Hancher Foot Bridge before ending up on the back side of Burge, where I promptly fell out on the ground and yelled for my other roommate to throw me down a beer and a cigarette.
Where does that leave me now? Well, the race is just 10 days away on Sunday, October 2. Race information can be found here. The mission of the race is to raise funds for individuals unable to afford breast cancer screenings and other support services and to educate individuals on the importance of early detection. ALL PROCEEDS from the race go to the Especially for You Fund and are used locally to provide breast cancer screening and other support services for individuals in need. My family was touched by breast cancer. My sister-in-law succumbed to this horrible disease at age 38, leaving my two nephews--ages 6 and 9 at the time--without a mom.
I should be able to endure a little pain and discomfort in honor of all the women, and men, who have fought breast cancer. (Shout out to my friend Donna in Texas who is also a survivor.)
The Couch to 5K program was going along pretty well for me until I hit a plateau at Week 5, when I was supposed to go from walking/running intervals of 5/8/5/8/5 to just 5/20! What the heck...running 20 minutes without stopping? I've been stuck here for weeks. Let's face it people, it takes a lot of energy to propel a mass like this through the atmosphere.
I mapped out a 5K route by my house. I "ran" it for the first time tonight. OK, mostly I ended up walking because it was hot and the concrete almost instantly gave me shin splints. Oh, how I long to just quit and say, "they already have my money...I don't need to show up for the race." But, alas, I will persevere. I probably should have signed up for the 5K WALK, which is more my speed.
Stay tuned. I'll post an update after the race!
I don't know what I was thinking when, earlier this year, some co-workers convinced me to run a 5K with them. They assured me that all I had to do was follow the Couch to 5K program and it would be a breeze. In just 8 short weeks I would be running a 5K like a pro. I bought into the hype...and assumed it would be totally easy since, at the time, I had almost 20 weeks until the 5K.
Hold up, dawg...if it sounds too good to be true, it probably is! First off, how many DD track stars do you see? None...I rest my case. In fact, I just googled "female Olympic runners with big boobs" and the first hit was "Why do women athletes tend to be flat-chested?" Followed by a story in the Orange County Register that begins, "For some women, the path to athletic excellence seems to be blocked by overly large breasts, ..." There you have it, I am doomed.
Then, there's that whole BMI business. Yes, I'm obese according to the charts. About a week ago, Sherri Shepherd tweeted, "Just figured out my BMI (body mass index) ... and it turns out I'M OBESE! WHAT!!!!" I feel your pain, Sherri. Something about that chart just ain't quite right.
Then I googled "fat people running 5K," and you'd be surprised at how many entries there are about that.
I tried to be a runner once in college. I took off with my roomie Cathy out of Burge Hall. I made it down the hill on Dubuque Street, before I had to stop...after that it is kind of a blur...I think I managed to cross the Park Road bridge and head back up the bike trail, crossing the Hancher Foot Bridge before ending up on the back side of Burge, where I promptly fell out on the ground and yelled for my other roommate to throw me down a beer and a cigarette.
Where does that leave me now? Well, the race is just 10 days away on Sunday, October 2. Race information can be found here. The mission of the race is to raise funds for individuals unable to afford breast cancer screenings and other support services and to educate individuals on the importance of early detection. ALL PROCEEDS from the race go to the Especially for You Fund and are used locally to provide breast cancer screening and other support services for individuals in need. My family was touched by breast cancer. My sister-in-law succumbed to this horrible disease at age 38, leaving my two nephews--ages 6 and 9 at the time--without a mom.
I should be able to endure a little pain and discomfort in honor of all the women, and men, who have fought breast cancer. (Shout out to my friend Donna in Texas who is also a survivor.)
The Couch to 5K program was going along pretty well for me until I hit a plateau at Week 5, when I was supposed to go from walking/running intervals of 5/8/5/8/5 to just 5/20! What the heck...running 20 minutes without stopping? I've been stuck here for weeks. Let's face it people, it takes a lot of energy to propel a mass like this through the atmosphere.
I mapped out a 5K route by my house. I "ran" it for the first time tonight. OK, mostly I ended up walking because it was hot and the concrete almost instantly gave me shin splints. Oh, how I long to just quit and say, "they already have my money...I don't need to show up for the race." But, alas, I will persevere. I probably should have signed up for the 5K WALK, which is more my speed.
Stay tuned. I'll post an update after the race!
Get your arse back in the game --- You're not a quitter! Quiters don't even try. Remember, you don't have to win -- you just need to finish in front of the women with the baby strollers!! Run for me, your insurance-less sister who wouldn't be able to even afford a mamogram if it wasn't for charity funding!!!
ReplyDeleteYeah, I could have written this, in fact I probably should have. I am going to sign up today, but I am more than a little intimidated by our other running partner. I did, however, win a metal last weekend in a 5k. Yeah. I walked it in 51 minutes and I guess the 30-39 crowd was a little thin...
ReplyDelete