If only I was 50 now...
I would have been a contender at the Farley "Kick Off to Summer" 2 mile run/walk.
I'll start with the back story...
About a week ago, two of my co-workers planted a seed in my head to join them in a 5K run in October. Let me set the record straight...I am not a runner. I went out for track once in the 8th grade. I threw the shot put. Oh, I think my coach probably put me in some other races, but I know I was never a winner. This body is not built for speed. However, I have always been one to jump on the bandwagon and give in to peer pressure, so although I haven't completely committed to running the 5K, I haven't abandoned the idea either. In fact, last weekend, I spent about two hours googling "fat person running 5K." Yes, there are numerous blogs and posts on this topic. I probably should have googled "fat old person running 5K" now that I think about it.
Last night (Friday), I show up in Farley and my sister tells me that she is getting up at 6:30 a.m. to participate in the Farley 2 mile run/walk. My sister getting up at 6:30 in and of itself is a small miracle that I had to witness. She asked if I wanted to go, so I said sure -- thinking it would be a good pre-test, if you will, of my abilities to run a 5K in October. Now, bear in mind that this was a completely spur of the moment decision; therefore, I did not have my running shoes, my sports bra, my iPod, or any of my other normal "I'm going to work out" gear. Additionally, I was meeting two life-long friends, Jean and Bob, for dinner on Friday night.
Lesson #1: It is probably not the best idea to drink 4 beers and 2 Bombay and tonics within 12 hours of attempting to "run" a 2 mile race. On a normal day, that would be cause to make me lie on the couch for several hours to shake the fuzziness in my head. I did take advantage of the opportunity to "carb load" by eating a ginormous plate of lobster ravioli for dinner.
This morning at 6:15, I waited anxiously in bed to see if Kathy was truly going to get up. Damn...I heard her rustling around in her room. Not to be outdone, I sprang out of bed, still trying to shake the fuzziness of last night's alcohol.
We get up to the Farley Park and check in for the race. There was the 2 mile run/walk that we were doing and an 8K for the more serious runners. I had great visions of running at least a mile. Ummm, yeah, that barely lasted until I made my way out of the park.
Lesson #2: Without my running shoes, I immediately started getting cramps in my shins. "Power through, power through" that's all I kept thinking. Then, without my sports bra...well, there was a lot of ... should I say "motion" going on. I felt a little self-conscious...but...what the hell, it's just Farley.
One of my motivations for doing this little jaunt was feeling secure in the notion that at least I would not come in last. Surely I could beat Kathy because she wasn't planning to run at all. I gained a couple of other lessons if I'm really going to try to do the 5K.
Lesson #3: I'm going to have to get off the treadmill and get outside to run. I need a lot of "data" when I run. I need my iPod, I need to be able to watch Bravo with closed captioning, I need to know my incline, my speed, how many minutes I've been running, how many minutes I have left, how far I've run, my average overall speed, the number of calories burned, I need a fan blowing cool air in my face. I said I am not a runner. I need a lot of distractions. Running outside on hard concrete, in the humidity, with unplanned hills, and lots of bugs flying in my face was just downright uncomfortable.
Lesson #4: Start out slow. My exuberance got the best of me, and I flew off the starting line. That lasted all of about 200 yards. Dammit...see, I needed to know my speed. Pace myself...I'm sure that was my problem. My physical condition had nothing to do with it!
In the end:
I'll start with the back story...
About a week ago, two of my co-workers planted a seed in my head to join them in a 5K run in October. Let me set the record straight...I am not a runner. I went out for track once in the 8th grade. I threw the shot put. Oh, I think my coach probably put me in some other races, but I know I was never a winner. This body is not built for speed. However, I have always been one to jump on the bandwagon and give in to peer pressure, so although I haven't completely committed to running the 5K, I haven't abandoned the idea either. In fact, last weekend, I spent about two hours googling "fat person running 5K." Yes, there are numerous blogs and posts on this topic. I probably should have googled "fat old person running 5K" now that I think about it.
Last night (Friday), I show up in Farley and my sister tells me that she is getting up at 6:30 a.m. to participate in the Farley 2 mile run/walk. My sister getting up at 6:30 in and of itself is a small miracle that I had to witness. She asked if I wanted to go, so I said sure -- thinking it would be a good pre-test, if you will, of my abilities to run a 5K in October. Now, bear in mind that this was a completely spur of the moment decision; therefore, I did not have my running shoes, my sports bra, my iPod, or any of my other normal "I'm going to work out" gear. Additionally, I was meeting two life-long friends, Jean and Bob, for dinner on Friday night.
Lesson #1: It is probably not the best idea to drink 4 beers and 2 Bombay and tonics within 12 hours of attempting to "run" a 2 mile race. On a normal day, that would be cause to make me lie on the couch for several hours to shake the fuzziness in my head. I did take advantage of the opportunity to "carb load" by eating a ginormous plate of lobster ravioli for dinner.
This morning at 6:15, I waited anxiously in bed to see if Kathy was truly going to get up. Damn...I heard her rustling around in her room. Not to be outdone, I sprang out of bed, still trying to shake the fuzziness of last night's alcohol.
We get up to the Farley Park and check in for the race. There was the 2 mile run/walk that we were doing and an 8K for the more serious runners. I had great visions of running at least a mile. Ummm, yeah, that barely lasted until I made my way out of the park.
Lesson #2: Without my running shoes, I immediately started getting cramps in my shins. "Power through, power through" that's all I kept thinking. Then, without my sports bra...well, there was a lot of ... should I say "motion" going on. I felt a little self-conscious...but...what the hell, it's just Farley.
One of my motivations for doing this little jaunt was feeling secure in the notion that at least I would not come in last. Surely I could beat Kathy because she wasn't planning to run at all. I gained a couple of other lessons if I'm really going to try to do the 5K.
Lesson #3: I'm going to have to get off the treadmill and get outside to run. I need a lot of "data" when I run. I need my iPod, I need to be able to watch Bravo with closed captioning, I need to know my incline, my speed, how many minutes I've been running, how many minutes I have left, how far I've run, my average overall speed, the number of calories burned, I need a fan blowing cool air in my face. I said I am not a runner. I need a lot of distractions. Running outside on hard concrete, in the humidity, with unplanned hills, and lots of bugs flying in my face was just downright uncomfortable.
Lesson #4: Start out slow. My exuberance got the best of me, and I flew off the starting line. That lasted all of about 200 yards. Dammit...see, I needed to know my speed. Pace myself...I'm sure that was my problem. My physical condition had nothing to do with it!
In the end:
- I finished the race in 26:13. I pretended not to notice that the winner was a 12 year old girl who finished in like 13 minutes. I swear she cheated.
- I wasn't last..I beat Kathy and some moms pushing double strollers.
- I finished 3 minutes ahead of the guy who won the 8K. I was happy that at least I didn't get lapped by that crowd.
- If I was already 50, I would have won my age group. The winner for the 50-59 group clocked in behind Kathy at 29:55. Next year--that medal is mine!
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| Kathy on the inhaler after crossing the finish line. |
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| I'm hot...and I'm not talking Paris Hilton hot. |
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| Thank God...she'd didn't go DFO on me. |
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| Sisters, are doin' for themselves... |
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